Confessions of a sometimes-quiet person

Do you know, even though for the first 18 or so years of my life, I was a very quiet person, and I am still (though to a lesser extent) an "introvert," it recently ocurred to me that I don't actually understand other quiet people any better than "extroverts" do?

"We are each of a taciturn nature, unwilling to say anything unless we are convinced that it will astound the whole room." (Elizabeth Bennet, very badly quoted from Pride and Prejudice)*

I think I tend to assume this is the rule for all quiet people. It's really not always true. Quiet people aren't necessarily so far above the rest of us that they can only condescend to speak occasionally. Sometimes when they do finally say something, it isn't revolutionary or insightful or even interesting. Maybe they had something scintillating to say a few moments ago in the conversation, but it moved too quickly for their careful manners to allow them to interrupt. Often they are left with only very inane comments to serve as their contribution, when such contribution is finally extracted from them. It's impossible to know, with a quiet person, if he or she is taking part in the conversation at all, sometimes. It might be that the quiet person is absorbed in train of thought that started with the conversation but quickly digressed into something more substantial, or the quiet person might just be studying someone else's shoes, wondering how your hand movements have anything to do with what you are saying, or worse, wondering when you are going to stop talking.

It's impossible to know, and I think it is a little bit unfair to both sides. The extrovert doesn't know if he or she is dominating the conversation too much, not asking the right questions, or annoying the person by persisting in the conversation (although an extrovert might feel a personal responsibility in keeping the conversation alive since, after all, conversation is the extrovert's gift). The introvert doesn't want to be rude but also doesn't want to be forced to speak at a moment when he or she actually has nothing to say on the subject (like when, in a moment of self-aware generosity, the extrovert feels compassion on the introvert and decides to draw him or her into the conversation by suddenly pausing with a "what do you think?"), and may feel a little guilty sharing his or her most intelligent comments since, after all, conversation is the extrovert's gift, and it would be humiliating for an extrovert to appear inferior in conversation to an introvert. Or sometimes quite the opposite is the case, and the introvert is simply to intimidated to collect their thoughts into something both intellible and audible.

Personally I think that I don't mind talking about anything except those subjects about which I have no knowledge, like most sports, video games, and celebrities. I am willing to ask questions enough to stay somewhat in the conversation on the first subject, because I think sports are an interesting kind of ritual for today's society, but as for the last two, I find them so boring I would rather stare at my own shoes than attempt to be interested in them.

*If someone should let me know what the actual quote is, I would be forever indebted to you for saving me from plagiarism.